When there’s a lack of words to put up an architecture
of my feelings I spread out wide nets of gropings
out about me, my sensitivities vigilant
to that rare abundance of inspiration.
Like today when the air is dry enough for perpetual
non-awareness I try to squeeze out from the
molecules themselves instances of wisdom that
have been recycled for ages.
Though I must say I do not see at all a
positive correlation between an abundance of
feelings and an abundance of words.
Like that time when I let go of Daddy.
I knew it was a day when my net of feelings
choked me into chitinous silence,
when angry glares and pursed lips were all
I could manage just to stay calm.
And for years now my wellsprings of expressions
where this monotonous pause is concerned has been void
of promptings, though my rhetorics have been abundant,
string upon string of them passing through my temples.
There’s still a lack of words, though bits of my theatricals
have been shamelessly aired to two handfuls of
down-to-earth trusted friends
Jalex, Nonoy, Atan, Toto, Magal, Nene, Emilio, William,
(written 5 years after Daddy died, missing him)